Harmful tips: step-by-step instructions on how to complicate your life

1. Plunge into the abyss of anxiety, premonitions and apprehensions

You may have noticed that waiting for an event is often harder for us than the event itself. We may be nervous for weeks when we’re going to ask a manager for a raise. It seems that he will just laugh in our face, or say that we do not deserve it, or put us out the door. And in the end, the conversation takes five minutes and goes well. So was it worth spending so much time and energy on the experiences?

Fear and anxiety are evolutionary mechanisms that helped ancestors survive. Today, we, modern residents of megacities, in most cases are not threatened with starvation, nor poisoning with the fruits of an unfamiliar tree, nor death from the fangs of a predator.

Our life has become much more calm and safe, and the habit of being afraid and nervous has remained and very spoils the life of many.

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In 9 cases out of 10, the worst thing that can happen in a given situation is that we will be refused. They will not rise, they will not go on a date with us, they will not agree to live happily ever after together.

But, most likely, our premonitions will not justify themselves and everything will end well. So just take the necessary step as soon as possible. After all, every “no” only brings you closer to the cherished “yes.”

2. Letting the Past Determine Who You Are

We all made mistakes that are still a shame. They made the wrong choices, which in one way or another affected life, ignored alarming signals – harbingers of trouble.

But the worst thing you can do is to get stuck in the past and force yourself to pay for these mistakes all your life. Time after time to scroll through what happened in your head and think how everything would have turned out if you had acted differently. This is a senseless, energy-consuming, and harmful practice.

As trite as it may seem, the past cannot be changed. You can’t do anything with it, but it can affect how you feel and who you think, even years later.

Don’t let the traumas and mistakes of the past define who you are in the present. It is in your power to change your attitude to what happened and stop suffering because of it.

3. Strive to always be right

You probably have your own beliefs about a wide variety of topics, and that’s fine. The main thing is not to hold on to your opinion with both hands, shrugging off any arguments.

The need to always be right, and that the last word was always yours, drives you into a trap, does not allow you to move on and build close relationships with others.

Everyone looks at the world through a certain prism, and it largely determines the decisions we make. Think about it: could it be that your point of view only complicates life? What is more important to you – your own opinion or the desired result? Stay always true to yourself or live the way you want?

Try to reconsider your views and leave others the right to their own point of view.

7 ways to make life harder for yourself

4. Focus on what is missing

Perhaps you dreamed of a career as a model but did not come out for this growth. Or about playing a musical instrument, but you didn’t have the ability to do it.

Everyone will surely have something that he lacks in himself: physical data, mind, certain character traits. Some would like to be more purposeful and assertive, others – more disciplined.

But maybe instead of complaining about how unlucky you are, it’s time to focus on what you have? On our abilities, on what do you do? And ideally – try to find something good in their “shortcomings”, turning them into advantages.

Yes, you may lack dedication, but you know how to live here and now and enjoy the moment. Perhaps your self-discipline is lame and your mind is constantly wandering somewhere, but thanks to this, you come up with non-standard ideas and solutions.

As long as you focus on what you lack, you lose sight of the opportunities at your disposal.

5. Feed your ego

Many of us dream of high self-esteem, but in fact, it is no better than low. In one case, we become overly confident in ourselves, because of which we make mistakes, offend other people, do not give enough; in the other, we are too worried about what hasn’t even happened yet, and we are timid to take the first step.

At the same time, in both cases, we are extremely fixated on ourselves. So what to do? Stop being a slave to your fears, doubts, and desires. To realize finally that the world does not revolve around us. It takes a lot of work and a lot of conversation.

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6. Exacerbate mistakes

We all make mistakes from time to time – it’s a question of what we do next. Sometimes in an attempt to save the situation, we begin to fuss, commit ill-considered actions, and as a result, everything only gets worse.

Or, for example, having missed a class in a fitness club, we do not return there the next day to catch up – we again do not come to training, convincing ourselves that “I am such a person.”

Or, having spent money on expensive education and in the middle of the educational process realizing that this sphere is not interesting to us, we do not drop out of school, but continue to spend time and money to still get a diploma. Or we stay with someone with whom there has long been no intimacy because to break up for us is to admit that the decision to live together was a mistake.

The more we deceive ourselves and others, the more complicated the situation becomes.

7. Think too carefully about everything

Of course, in order to achieve something in life, you need certain plans and goals, but the mistake of many is only to think, but not to do anything. Dream of moving, but not even to feel the ground and not look for work in a new country. Think about changing jobs, but don’t update your resume or go through interviews. Calculate in advance all the moves and possible obstacles, but do not move from the spot.

Ask yourself how long you’ve been planning a particular step. Isn’t it time to move on to decisive action? Yes, you can fail, but you can’t put straws everywhere.

You may never “mature” and never be ready enough – but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. Every moment of delay and hesitation goes to you more in the minus than in the plus.

The best thing you can do for yourself and your future is to take the first step today. Do 10 squats, write 100 words, respond to that very vacancy. Just do it now.

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