Friends: they love each other, they get angry, they argue, they get along. There are the best, the late, the funny, the crazy or the wrong friends. We take a look at five types of friends and find out which one you are.
Best Friends: Thick and Thin
There are the kinds of best friends you meet at school, playing sports or on the bus. At first, you don’t see it coming, until you realize they’re on the same wavelength.
And then there’s the old friendship of the sandbox. They already dug together in the sand, so sitting upright was another big deal. You practically grew up at each other’s kitchen table and every free minute was yours. You know the parents, the peculiarities, the points of discord, the past, and the dreams for the future.
Whether known by chance or known for a long time: these people are the ones who love to surround themselves. Funny faces get together, besiege each other in talks, and discuss the meaning and foolishness of being in love last summer.
It’s these kinds of friends who affectionately call you “stupid cow” or “full pole.” Friends who aren’t overwhelmed by the absolute horror when they walk into your messy room. Those who howl, laugh, roar, argue with you. In short: simply the BEST.
Friends of purpose – always available
“Hi Luis, do you have physics for me?” Yes, there are also these types of friends. Those who give and those who only receive. Whether it’s the guy in the class who gives them all their homework and really just wants to be a part of them. Or the girl you get along with because they take her to school every day and it’s free.
Everything is easy for you, for them it is the “thank you” or the “great on your part” that inspires them. Have you ever wondered if you have friends like that? Or are you that kind of friend to someone?
Follow to follow
As a digital native, it goes without saying that you are networked with everyone and everything. You have 2000 friends on Facebook, but since Facebook is sometimes empty, your 345 followers on Instagram and the other half on Snapchat inspire you a lot more.
You seem a little jealous of what Lisa and Lena are making clear, but hey, after all, you follow them too. They are friends on Snapchat, Insta, TikTok, and Facebook. But friendship is a very flexible term in this particular case.
Hand in the heart: How many of your network friends do you know personally? Which of them can you call at half-past two at night with lovesickness? Who would you invite to a birthday party and who would actually come?
Digital natives are the generation that is very familiar with digital technologies as they grew up with them. Social media or blogging is involved in many areas of their lives. As a result, the real and virtual worlds become blurred.
Party friends – And come on!
Strictly speaking, you don’t have much to do with them. But when there’s a birthday party somewhere, there’s always a guy or a girl there. They only know each other vaguely, but it’s always fun when they’re at the beginning.
Because they bring momentum to the group, always have a reserved saying, and spread a lot of positive energy in the room. You often share friends from the same circle of friends, get scared by the same music, or just have the same weird sense of humor.
These people also enrich your life. Maybe a new best friend or a new best friend stumbles upon your feet as you dance together? Perhaps they have more in common than fighting together?
False friends – Smile and say hello
There are harmless and dangerous false friendships. The harmless way is when someone pretends to be on good terms with you when they don’t like you at all. You exchange subtleties from time to time. Here a little blah blah, there’s a little bit of “Hey, how are you?” It doesn’t hurt, but it’s not particularly pleasant either.
The most dangerous type of false friend, however, is one in which you are very disappointed by someone you trusted.
A supposedly good close friend or best friend who then stabs you nastily in the back talks nonsense about you, lies to your face, or doesn’t help you when it’s important.
Then they apologize: “I’m so sorry, honey” or “Hey, it wasn’t.” Maybe they’re back together because they think: we all make mistakes. Only to be disappointed again (in the worst case). This hurts and hurts, but you will learn from it. Hopefully.
What would life be like without friends?
Friendship, perhaps even “intimate” friendships, help us overcome periods of drought. With the pain of love. When moving abroad. In the crisis of life. Friends inspire us, support us, share experiences and support us. Or they just make you happy.
Some friendships last a lifetime. Others dissolve again soon after because what connects was not much. Or because both have developed further, just in different directions. How do you recognize true friendship? How do you win them and how do you break up with fake friends? This is what psychologists and sociologists say…
What is a friendship?
What we mean by “friendship” varies from person to person. Especially since there are all kinds of different friendships:
- Loose friendships
- Best friends (now also “BFF” – “Best Friends Forever”)
- Communities of convenience (temporary)
- Friendship plus (this is where sex is added, also abbreviated as “F+” or “friends with benefits”)
- Even researchers find it difficult to define. The philosopher Aristotle once called friendship “one soul in two bodies.” Others say, “A true friend is the one who takes your hand but touches your heart.”
Friendship could also be defined as a personal, voluntary relationship based on mutual sympathy, trust, altruism, and support. However, that is not entirely clear either.
Until the seventeenth century, the terms “friendship” and “kinship” were even used synonymously. This original meaning has been preserved in some dialects to this day. The same can be said for the term “blood friendship,” which originally also meant kinship. One thing is certain: the longing for friends is innate in us.
When do friendships arise?
Friendships are already formed in childhood when playing in the sandbox with your “favorite playmate” or on vacation. Others later in puberty, playing sports or at school. Other friendships emerge as adults from study and professional contacts.
When will your circle of true friends expand?
When researchers from Aalto University and Oxford University examined friendships more intensively, they found that the age of 25 marks a kind of tipping point: by then, the circle of friends will expand.
After that, it gets smaller and smaller. That doesn’t even have to be bad! The friendships that remain with us often become an intimate bond and are therefore the beginning of something wonderful that will accompany us throughout life: “deep” friendship and familiarity. Because these people know who we are.
It is not uncommon for a friendship to accompany us longer than the relationship with our partner or spouse. No wonder: those who have friends are demonstrably happier, more satisfied, more balanced, even healthier. In short: “Friendship should never be taken for granted because true friendship is almost as rare as great love.”
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